HESPERIA — After her injured husband, Army Sgt. James Jesse De La Cruz, ended his life after serving in Iraq, his wife is organizing a march to bring awareness to veterans with post-traumatic stress disorder.
Air Force veteran Evita Yniquez De La Cruz, said her husband, James, 29, was “not himself” when he ended his life about two years ago in the family’s home.
De La Cruz, 32, a long time resident of the High Desert and who is not related to the author of this story, said she’s inviting the community to walk with her during a “Carry The Fallen Ruck-March” at the end of the month in Hesperia.
“We’re walking on June 27th because it’s National PTSD Day and I want people to know that it’s OK to come out of the shadows and to talk about it,” said De La Cruz, who first met her husband while they served in Iraq in 2009. “Many veterans suffer with PTSD and some suffer in silence because they’re afraid of what people will think of them or their families.”
De La Cruz, a homecare nurse who lives in Oak Hills, said she plans on carrying a 22-pound ruck (backpack) during the walk, which “symbolizes the 22 veterans who die by suicide every day,” a number that is confirmed by the Department of Veterans Affairs and has been reported by several media outlets.
De La Cruz said she plans to start her “roughly three hour” march at 9 a.m. at Stater Bros. located on the corner of Main Street and Maple Avenue. From there, she intends to walk approximately 8 miles east on Main Street to Hesperia Lake on Lake Arrowhead Road.
“You don't have to be a veteran to participate,” said De La Cruz, who is the mother of Lilyana, 4, and Marc Anthony, 11. “People that join us don't have to wear a ruck to participate. Any support will be greatly appreciated.”
De La Cruz said besides her ruck, she’ll carry an American Flag and the memories of her husband who she met and fell in love with in a war zone in 2009.
“I was a medic when I first met James who a patient in a medical facility in Iraq,” De La Cruz said. “We were just friends but we soon fell in love in a very ugly place.”
After they both came back to the states, James left Fort Hood, Texas where he was stationed and visited Evita in California who was in the Air Force Reserves out of March AFB.
After the couple married in Las Vegas in December of 2010, De La Cruz finished nursing school and James was sent back to Iraq the following year.
During his time in the Middle East, James had emergency surgery after he injured his back. De La Cruz said the injury was caused after her husband repeatedly loading heavy rounds into a self-propelled howitzer.
By July 2012, De La Cruz said her husband was back home in Oak Hills and in so much chronic pain that he could not function normally, which included the inability to hold his daughter.
“Not being able to carry Lily in his arms tormented James,” De La Cruz said. “He started becoming more depressed as the days went on. I even called the cops when he told me that he was going to kill himself. I wanted him to be well but he was changing from the inside out.”
De La Cruz said her husband ended his life on January 13, 2013, “the same day James decided to fix breakfast for the kids to give me some time off.”
“Being a nurse, I tried so hard to save him,” said De La Cruz as she began to weep. “I really tried to save him.”
According to De La Cruz, her husband’s funeral “was a blur” and the pain of losing him made her feel numb all over.
As a tribute to her husband, The Patriot Riders motorcycle group was invited to accompany the De La Cruz family and their military “hero” from Oak Hills to Riverside National Cemetery, according to report on patriotguard.org.
“I’m in a widow support group and I talk to a lot of ladies who are suffering — some not young enough to drink yet,” De La Cruz said. “I want to be there for them and for the many veterans who are calling out for help.”
De La Cruz said she had a chance to share her story with the Barstow Survivor Outreach Services (SOS) at Fort Irwin where many attendees spoke of their pain and loss, and decided to seek help.
On Memorial Day, De La Cruz said she participated in a 40-mile ruck march for “PTSD and Veteran suicide awareness.” She said the march was bittersweet for her because it ended at the cemetery where her husband was laid to rest.
“At the cemetery, a World War Two widow asked me what battle James died in. I was too ashamed to tell her that he killed himself, “ De La Cruz said. “When I finally told her, she told me not to be ashamed and that James did die in a battle — a battle that he brought home with him on the inside.”
For more information on the march, search Carry the Fallen - Hesperia, Ca’ onine at wwwactiveheroes.org or search ‘Military Suicide Widow Awareness Project’ on Facebook.com.